Locker Room Etiquette

This is the locker room, not your living room.

For those of us who played sports in high school and/or college, the locker room is where we laugh, cry, fight, make jokes, and become friends. If you are an athlete, I'm sure you can agree that getting undressed and dressed in a locker room really isn't a big deal, especially when you are surrounded by your team, your family. But still, this is all possible because of the unwritten rules of the locker room, which I intend to share with you here. Things are all good in the team room, but what about the general public locker room? Here are my thoughts.


Please, no gratuitous nudity.
I can say that I am unusually comfortable in any locker room, and your nudity really doesn't bother me because I'm not looking. HOWEVER,  madam, there is no need to be naked in excess of about 1 minute and 30 seconds. Quick story: I was at the Judge Me Zone, aka Planet Fitness last week, and I walk in to my normal locker to put my stuff in my locker and change. No lie, this woman was  naked for over an hour! I walked in, changed, worked out (1 hour cardio), changed, and left. By the time I was leaving, she had JUST put on a bra. Now...that is too much. WHAT ARE YOU DOING FOR THAT LONG? And, I'm assuming that she had just gotten out of the shower when I got there because she was taking out fresh clothes from her bag. This is the locker room, not your living room!!! Put some clothes on...or at least cover up with a towel. Please, and thanks.

Get off of your cell phone
So, I am a member at a local gym (because I can't get out of my 2 year contract without paying A LOT of money) and PF. At my local gym, I often encounter Loud Cell Phone Talkers. No one wants to hear about your drama with your boyfriend, or what you had for lunch. And, why must you speak so loudly? Is the other person hard of hearing? In that case, texting probably works better. GET OFF OF YOUR PHONE! I'm tired because I just busted my butt lifting weights and the last thing I want to hear is your voice. Lower your voice, or leave the locker room!

Stop showing off
Listen, miss. I'm so happy you are fit and toned and everything that I aim to be, but please, stop hogging the mirror. I get it, you want to make sure your eyeliner is perfect and that your gym outfit is on 10, but some of us just want to make sure our shorts aren't on backwards. Kindly do all of this before your house.

Smile, Jesus loves you
Even though I just talked (typed?) a lot of bull, the truth is, I don't really see anyone in the locker room as a threat. Too many times, I think women automatically think they are being judged by other women in the locker room. And, while that may well be true, don't sweat it. It's okay to smile and say hello to the person next to you. We're all at the gym for the same reason--to get fit! So smile! Make a new friend in the locker room...just don't be creepy and stare while she's changing. Because that will not make you friends.


What bothers YOU in the locker room? Be sure to comment!!!